Thursday, November 17, 2005

Monkey Check

Awful, awful dream last night.

I woke up last night at 11:30 to give Stewart some cough medicine. I tossed and turned/ got up to get water, etc. until nearly one, trying to get back to sleep.

When at last I did sleep, I fell into the following dream:

I am still trying to get back to sleep, so I get up to get some water. I notice that there are drops of water on the leaves of one of my plants, which is strange because I haven't watered them recently- after all, it's the middle of the night. A drop of water splashes onto the plant from the ceiling. Then another. The drops come faster, but there is no reason for them. It's not raining. The drops spread, coming out in a line from their point of origin above the plant until the whole ceiling is covered with slow, slightly gooey drips of what is supposedly water, but yellow colored and not quite right.

I have been raising my head higher and higher to watch the spread of the water across the ceiling, and now my neck is bent back as far as it can go and it's aching. I suddenly realize that I can't move it at all, nor can I move the rest of my body.

The force of my head leaning back pulls the rest of my body down- so I am kind of on my knees, yet with my back on the ground, and my neck still stretched at an impossible angle. My eyes and mouth are wide open but I can't shut them- I am lying there completely paralyzed as the water drips around and I remember thinking that I HAVE to shut my mouth or my eyes because I don't want that yellow water inside me. A slow drip comes down toward my mouth, and I mentally shrink away, but it never touches me, because suddenly I am lying on my back in my bed in the dark.

I am in a similar position- my neck tilted back impossibly and my eyes and mouth stuck wide open. I am still totally paralyzed, and I realize that I am being possessed by a demon.

The knowledge allows me to talk and I start screaming like a holy roller, telling the demon to go away, and how much I love Jesus, etc. etc. The demon told me that it was the anger in me that had allowed it to come in (which makes sense, given that the reason I had had so much trouble sleeping in real life was that I was angry at someone- and even though we had talked about it and worked through it and I knew I should let it go, I was having trouble doing so).

So I said I was sorry, that I would let it go, that I wasn't angry anymore.

In a second, I somehow knew the demon was gone, and I opened my eyes- I was in my dark bedroom again. I could move normally and for a moment I thought I was really awake, but then I saw these projections on the wall- similar to overhead projections you would see in a high school classroom- of animals with sneers on their faces. They didn't look friendly, and I didn't like them. One was a monkey, and I remember thinking that Owen definitely wouldn't like that. So I shook Kyle to wake him up and I was screaming and screaming.

Then I actually woke up and my neck was contorted into some weird positon.

In the morning, I told Owen I'd had a bad dream and he told me, "It's okay, no big monkeys in here!"

1 comment:

Britt said...

maybe you're pregnant with damien!!!!

and i love your eldest's reaction. owen's very sweet.