So Kyle and I had a big talk the other day about how Baby #3 (scheduled to arrive via C-section June 1) is going to change our lives and what we can do to make things easier for ourselves.
We decided that since I will be nursing the baby full-time for at least the first few months, I will be up with the baby at night, and Kyle will get up with Owen and Stewart if they have bad dreams or need tucking in.
If the baby sleeps in, I will sleep in, while Kyle gets up with the boys and feeds them breakfast. In the event of a particularly rough night, Kyle will even get them ready for pre-school on his own.
The only other demand I had was that Kyle do something special with the boys each day where it's just the three of them.
Kyle is a very devoted father and gives most of his rare free time to me and the kids for family outings and meals. However, up until now he hasn't set aside much time to be with the kids without ME, and I know from experience that that is key when there's a new baby.
My kids, like most, cling to "Mommy" like glue, even when Dad is there, perfectly able to help them. But with a new baby, kids are even clingier!
I want them to get used to having some special Daddy time that they enjoy so that they won't resent my time and energy being taken up with the baby.
Kyle obviously understood the importance of that, because he made a special effort tonight after dinner to take the kids out on a "secret mission."
They came back with a new iPod Nano and an iTunes gift certificate for me. I was suspicious at first; this sounded an awful lot like a gift for Kyle rather than me (although he has two iPods of his own already).
But then he explained that I'd be able to put audiobooks on it to listen to while breastfeeding or in the hospital, which actually does make sense.
It is so nice to see that Kyle takes my concerns seriously, and that at least with this third baby, we will be able to resolve SOME of our problems before they begin.
There's nothing worse than trying to fight fair with your spouse when neither of you has had more than an hour of sleep in a month, you haven't had sex in forever, and you both smell like sour milk.